Attorney
This month marks the anniversary of Alexander Hamilton’s fateful duel with Vice President Aaron Burr. One life cut short and another ruined because two of the leading lawyers of their day decided to settle their differences by violence instead of talking things out.
Why bring this up in a blog about divorce? Because when a relationship breaks down, some people still reach for the 21st-century equivalent of a dueling pistol: a lawyer whose goal is to turn every case into a cage match.
But for many high-asset couples in New Mexico—especially business owners and professionals like doctors, dentists, accountants, and lawyers—there’s a better way forward. Mediation and collaborative law offer smart, strategic alternatives to courtroom conflict, and Attorney Bob Matteucci is working with a growing number of Albuquerque area couples who appreciate this.
Mediation: A Neutral Ground for Settlement
If litigation is like a duel, mediation is like seeing that things might get rough and calling for a truce before things escalate.
The process falls somewhere between negotiation and litigation. It is done outside the courtroom, but has a bit more structure and formality than a standard negotiation, making it ideal for resolving high-stakes disputes that most people would prefer to keep out of the public eye.
Both spouses sit down with a trained mediator—like Bob Matteucci—who helps guide them toward agreement. It’s not a therapy session, and the mediator can’t force everyone to come to an agreement, but it is structured and confidential.
The goal is to move forward, efficiently and respectfully. Which is especially important when a couple is working through complex financial arrangements or struggling to come to an agreement on child custody.
When successful, the agreement struck can be written up by the mediator, filed with the court if they are also serving as legal counsel, and approved by the judge.
Most people find this much more palatable than ceding control of their personal life or finances to the judge and hoping for the best.
Collaborative Law: Lay Down Your Weapons and Look to the Future
Collaborative divorce takes it one step further. It’s the closest thing you can get to “Kumbaya” while still splitting up.
Both spouses agree in writing not to go to court and instead rely on the counsel of their collaboratively trained attorneys—like Bob Matteucci—to guide them through their separation and help them build their post-divorce future.
But the lawyers are not the only people sitting with the couple at the negotiating table. Other trained professionals like accountants, business valuation experts, child specialists, and relationship counselors may also be there to weigh in and help craft a solution everyone is happy with.
Everyone’s working from the same set of facts. And everyone agrees: no threats, no surprises, no last-minute ambushes. The focus is on preserving relationships, protecting the children, and crafting a divorce agreement that looks to the future instead of the past, which is especially important when business partnerships or co-parenting will continue long after the couple leaves the courthouse.
Serving Families with Dignity & Compassion
Most divorcing couples in the Albuquerque area don’t want a fight. They want closure. They want clarity. They want to disentangle their finances, protect what they’ve built, and step into the next chapter of their lives.
That’s what mediation and collaborative divorce make possible. They are sophisticated tools for smart, capable people who’d rather negotiate than duel, and Attorney Bob Matteucci is certified to lead both processes.
If you are looking for an alternative to the legal battle that is traditional divorce, Bob is ready to discuss the pros and cons of mediation and collaborative divorce with you. Please contact Matteucci Family Law today to set up a meeting.