Attorney
Being a grandparent is special. Humans are one of the only species in the world whose members live far beyond their prime child-bearing years. There are even studies that suggest human brains are wired to benefit from becoming grandparents.
Sometimes, however, the role of grandparent expands. You quickly go from spoiling the kids during special visits, to taking over responsibility for their primary care. If this is the situation you are in, you are not alone, around two out of every twenty-five kids in the state of New Mexico are being raised by a grandparent or other member of their extended family.
When circumstances require you to step in and raise a grandchild — whether it’s because of their parent’s health struggles, substance use challenges, incarceration, or some other event that upends everything — the decision to take on full-time caregiving is one you make without a second thought. You will do whatever it takes to give the child you love the stability, safety, and care they deserve.
As a seasoned family law attorney, Bob Matteucci can help you figure out what steps you should take to ensure your grandchild is legally protected while they are in your care.
Understanding Your Options
While stepping up to care for your grandchild is not something you consider optional, there are different options for how to formalize the new role you are taking on.
Informal Custody
Many families begin with an informal arrangement: a parent verbally agrees that the grandparent will care for the child. No legal documents are drafted, and nobody goes to court.
This is simple and straightforward, and it can work in trusting relationships for a short amount of time. But it offers no legal protection if the situation changes and the parent no longer wants you involved. Your ability to make important decisions about the child’s healthcare or education will also be limited.
Kinship Guardianship
Kinship guardianship is a more formal option. It involves going to court to get official legal and physical custody of the child. You gain responsibility for the child’s care and decision-making authority, but the parents retain the ability to petition the court to end the guardianship and resume their parental role.
Guardianship can make it easier to enroll children in school, consent to medical care, and manage financial matters. It also provides greater stability if it is unclear how long the child may need to live with you.
Adoption
If you are certain you are going to be the child’s permanent caregiver, adoption may be an option. Like kinship guardianship, it gives you full custody of the child. Unlike kinship guardianship, it completely severs the link between the child and their birth parents, and legally transfers that title to you.
Choosing which path is right for your family isn’t just about choosing the amount of paperwork you are willing to do. It’s about relationships. Many grandparents want to honor the birth parent’s role where possible, keep extended family connections intact, and minimize trauma for the child. But it’s also about creating certainty, and knowing you can take whatever actions are necessary to take care of the child you love.
Serving Families With Dignity & Compassion
If you are a grandparent stepping into the role of parent, you are not alone. New Mexico law recognizes the unique role you play, and is ready to help you solidify your standing as temporary or permanent parent. With thoughtful guidance, you can find a solution that honors your commitment, protects your family, and supports the child’s well-being as they grow.
If you’d like to explore different options for taking custody of your grandchild, contact the Matteucci Law Firm for a consultation.