Self-Care During Divorce: You’ve Got To Put On Your Mask Before Assisting Others

By Bob Matteucci

“In the event of a sudden loss of cabin pressure, oxygen masks will automatically descend from the ceiling. Grab the mask, and pull it over your face. Please secure your own mask before assisting others.”

If you have ever flown on a commercial airline you have heard the flight attendants tell you something like this before takeoff. It’s a sobering reminder that hurtling through the air in a metal tube is not 100% safe. It’s also one of the few times in your life you will be explicitly directed to take care of yourself.

One of the other times you will be bluntly instructed to take care of yourself first is in the Matteucci Family Law office. We encourage all of our clients to intentionally practice self-care as they navigate New Mexico’s divorce courts. A failure to do so can leave you mentally and physically debilitated, and have a negative impact on others who are depending on you. 

What self-care during divorce looks like is different for every person. The easiest way to figure out what it means to you is to think about activities that make you feel recharged or relaxed, and try to make time to do at least one of these activities each day. 

To make sure you are able to do this, you need a diverse array of activities that fits this description. (After all, you can’t fly to the beach and sip a cocktail every day.) Think of some things you like to do at home, and others that you have to leave the house to do. Some that involve other people, and some that give you some alone time. Activities that cost money, and others that are free. Taking the time to actually write out a list of things you enjoy can itself be a form of self care! 

Setting aside time to do one of these feel-good activities each day isn’t selfish. It’s one of the best things you can do to prepare yourself for your post-divorce life. 

Post-divorce you won’t have a partner there to support you or hold you back as you move forward with your life. You will have you. And you deserve the best. 

So do your family and friends. 

Your loved ones are counting on you to make it through your divorce in one piece. This is particularly true if you have small children. Choosing to take care of yourself shows them how to take care of themselves while modeling the resilience, grit, and determination we all want our children to develop. 

Serving New Mexico Families with Dignity & Compassion

If you are filing for divorce, your plane isn’t just hitting some turbulence, it’s going down. The masks are coming out, and it’s time to get yours on so you have a fighting chance to help the others around you.

Making an effort to take care of yourself during and after your divorce can give you the extra oxygen you need to ensure you and your family don’t just survive the divorce process, but are set up to thrive during the next chapter of your life. 

As a seasoned family law attorney, and a divorcee, Bob Matteucci understands better than most the toll a divorce can take on you and your loved ones. He and his team are ready to help you navigate the legal, financial, and emotional challenges you are facing. Please contact Bob today to discuss your case.

About the Author
Bob Matteucci is a board certified family law specialist, with a statewide practice in the area of divorce and family law.