Attorney
Every architect or contractor will tell you the same thing: breaking ground is not the beginning of the building process. That first shovel of dirt is a big step forward, but it comes somewhere in the middle of the building process. What comes first is a lot of planning and paperwork.
This closely parallels the divorce process. Filing for divorce may mark the official start of the case in the court’s eyes, but that paperwork can only be prepared after a lot of prep work has been done.
In this blog post, Attorney Bob Matteucci outlines the various stages of the divorce process from the real start to the actual finish line.
Stage One: Drafting the Plans
Before a building project begins, the builder must decide what they want the final product to look like. Divorce begins the same way: with an honest assessment of what’s going on and what you want your life to look like post-divorce.
This stage involves a lot of information gathering and soul searching.
New Mexico’s financial disclosure rules require both spouses to exchange a full picture of their finances early in the process. That typically means pulling together:
- Personal and business tax returns
- Bank, investment, and retirement account statements
- Property titles and mortgage documents
- Business records and ownership agreements
- Any existing buy-sell agreements or partnership contracts
If you have children, this is also where you start to think about co-parenting, joint custody, and child support payments.
Once you have all this information, you can decide what pathway to divorce you would prefer to take. If you and your soon-to-be-ex are on the same page about every issue you must resolve, an uncontested divorce may be the best option. If there are some disagreements you need to hammer out, or you want extra assistance unwinding your joint finances or crafting a child custody agreement that truly fits your family, mediation or collaborative divorce might be appropriate. If things are getting heated, and you think it is going to be a contested divorce, you may be headed toward litigation.
The right approach depends on the complexity of your finances, the nature of your relationship with your spouse, and how much control you want over the outcome. A seasoned attorney like Bob Matteucci can help you evaluate your options and decide which one will work best for your family and finances.
Stage Two: Temporary Orders Address Unexpected Site Conditions
Any builder will tell you that the conditions on the ground don’t always match what the plans assumed. Divorce is the same. Once the process is underway, real-life pressures emerge. Temporary orders address these immediate needs.
A temporary order may govern how parenting time is handled while your case is pending, whether spousal support is owed before the case is finalized, and put guardrails on how jointly owned assets are managed while negotiations continue.
For business owners, this stage requires particular care. The decisions made here about business operations, income, and access to accounts can set the tone for everything that follows. The goal is to keep the business functioning and its value intact while the larger questions are being worked out.
Stage Three: Negotiating a Settlement
This is the heart of the process, and it can happen around the table in your attorney’s conference room or at a court-ordered settlement facilitation. The issues that must be resolved include:
- Division of marital property, including business interests since New Mexico is a community property state
- Spousal support (aka alimony) — whether it’s owed, for how long, and in what amount
- Custody and parenting arrangements
- Child support obligations
The engineering analogy is apt here: good structural design requires understanding both the loads the structure must bear and the materials you have to work with. A settlement that looks good on paper but ignores cash flow realities, tax consequences, or the practical needs of running a business is a structure that won’t stand. The goal is an agreement that both parties can actually live with — one that reflects the real world, not just a legal formula.
Attorney Bob Matteucci, who, before becoming an attorney, went through the divorce process as a business owner, brings business sense and an MBA degree to this analysis. Having an attorney with real financial fluency, not just legal training, matters here.
Stage Four: Finalizing the Divorce
When an agreement is reached, a judge reviews and signs off on it. If the parties can’t reach full agreement, the unresolved issues go to trial. Either way, this stage produces a final divorce decree and the case comes to a close.
You can think of this document like a certificate of occupancy. The structure has been inspected, the work has been approved, and the building is ready for its new use. It’s a significant moment, but it’s not the end of the project.
Stage Five: Implementing the Post-Divorce Plan
Once the divorce decree is signed the real work begins.
Titles are transferred. Retirement accounts are divided through qualified domestic relations orders (QDROs). Business ownership interests are restructured. Parenting schedules go into effect. What was shared becomes separate, and the details you spent so much time negotiating become your reality.
This stage is often underestimated. People assume the hard part is over once the judge signs off on your divorce, and in some respects it is. But implementation takes time, attention, and sometimes additional legal work. Done well, it closes the loop on the divorce and opens the door to what’s next.
Stage Six: Moving Forward
After divorce, many people find themselves with more clarity than they expected. The division is behind them. They know what they have, what they owe, and what they’re responsible for. The path forward is defined.
That’s not a small thing. Uncertainty is expensive, emotionally and financially. A well-negotiated divorce replaces uncertainty with structure. And structure allows for growth.
Serving Families with Dignity & Compassion
If you’re facing a divorce in the Albuquerque area and want to work with an attorney who can guide you through everything from the planning stage to implementation, Bob Matteucci is here for you. Please contact him today to schedule a meeting and discuss your case.